绝望的主妇 一、二季剧本全集（转自天涯）-3
Gabrielle: Why?
Carlos: Are you deaf? I just said, he's not doing his job.
Gabrielle: It's dark, you just can't see that the lawn has been mowed.
Carlos: It hasn't been. Feel this grass.
Gabrielle: I'm not feeling the grass! Let's just get going, come on! We're late! (Walks off towards the car as Carlos looks closely at the grass.)
(Cut to: EXT. OUTDOOR PARTY VENUE --- NIGHT)
(Carlos walks with Gabrielle on his arm. The party is filled with elegantly dressed people.)
Carlos: (throws his car keys at the valet) Take care of it.
Valet: Yes, sir.
Carlos: There's Tanaka. Time for me to go into my dance.
Gabrielle: (smiles) Good luck, sweetheart. (Kisses Carlos on the cheek.)
(Carlos smiles at Gabrielle and walks away towards TANAKA. Gabrielle looks around, and stops a Waiter passing by.)
Gabrielle: Oh, excuse me.
Waiter: Ma'am?
Gabrielle: You see that man who just walked away? Can you make sure he has a drink in his hand all night long. (Tucks a folded banknote in his pocket.)
Waiter: (smiles) Yes, ma'am.
(Gabrielle looks around, and hurries off.)
(Cut to: INT. Gabrielle'S CAR --- NIGHT (LATER)
(Gabrielle is driving the car. We see that she's driving back to Wisteria Lane. She parks the car in her driveway, hurries into the open garage door, reappearing pushing the lawn mower. She pushes the machine onto the grass and begins to mow the lawn, tottering along in her high heels and party dress.)
(Cut to: EXT. OUTDOOR PARTY VENUE --- NIGHT (STILL LATER)
(Gabrielle hurries back to the party. She sees Carlos with TANAKA, a drink on his hand, who hasn't even noticed that she'd left. She sighs with relief, running her hand along her hair. Gabrielle picks a piece of grass from her hair, throwing it over her shoulder hastily. )
(Cut to: EXT. SOLIS HOUSE --- DAY (THE NEXT MORNING)
(Carlos comes out of the front door and walks down the walkway. He stops and crouches down to run his hand along the mowed grass. Looking puzzled, Carlos straightens up and continues walking to the car mollified. We pan up to see Gabrielle watching from the upstairs balcony, sighing with relief as she's successfully covered her affair.)
CUT TO: [INT. SUPERMARKET --- DAY]
(Susan pushes her cart along the aisle. Spotting Mrs. Huber, she tries to sneak past, with no luck. Mrs. Huber notices her.)
Mrs. Huber: Susan? Susan!
Susan: (smiles) Oh. Mrs. Huber, how you doing?
Mrs. Huber: Not too well, I'm afraid. I'm trying to find something to soothe my stomach.
Susan: It's upset?
Mrs. Huber: Yeah, I had the worst macaroni and cheese at the wake, it's been running through my system ever since.
Susan: (sympathetic smile) Oh.
Mrs. Huber: And I need to be at my best tonight. Edie Britt's son is spending the night tonight.
Susan: (raises her eyebrows) He's spending the night?
Mrs. Huber: Apparently, Edie is having a gentleman friend over on dinner, and I think she plans on entertaining into the wee hours, if you know what I mean.
(Susan is stunned. She immediately hurries out, leaving her cart in the middle of the aisle while Mrs. Huber is busy browsing.)
Mrs. Huber: Oh, here's some antacid. Have you ever tried this? (Looks up, notices Susan is gone)
(Cut to: INT. Susan's HOUSE - KITCHEN ---- NIGHT Susan is pacing the floor as Julie watches her, curled up on the couch.)
Susan: I can't believe it. This can't be happening. Mike can't like Edie better than me, he just can't!
Julie: I don't know what's going on. Maybe they're just... having dinner.
(Susan gives her a look.)
Julie: You're right. They're doing it.
(Cut to: EXT. WISTERIA LANE --- NIGHT)
(Susan holds a measuring cup and walks up to Edie's front porch. She rings the doorbell.)
Susan: Edie?
(Susan walks along the side of Edie's house, peering in the back door.)
Susan: Edie? Hello…?
(Susan tries the back door and finds it open. Hearing music, she walks in.)
Susan: Anybody home? I need to borrow sugar?
(Susan walks along the corridor, where she picks up a piece of Edie's discarded clothing. She goes into the living room, where she sees lots of candles lit, glasses of wine and chocolate on the coffee table. The measuring drop drops out of her hand and onto the floor. She picks up Edie's pink, flowered bra, looking at it as she hears a noise.)
Edie: [OS] Oh! Oh my god!
(Susan realizes what Edie is doing upstairs. Upset, she drops down onto the couch)
Narrator: And just like that, the possibility that Susan had clung onto, the maybe of Mike Delfino was gone forever. And despite the precariousness of the situation, Susan took a moment to mourn her loss.
(Susan throws Edie's bra behind her, where it catches the flame of the candles. It starts to burn, and lights up the curtain as well. Susan picks up a piece of chocolate and eats it. Smelling smoke, she turns around and discovers the curtain is on fire.)
Susan: Oh... Oh! Oh!
(Susan tries to put out the fire with no avail. She throws the leftover wine from the glasses onto the fire, which makes it worse.)
Narrator: It didn't take long for Susan to realize, this was just not her night.
(Susan abandons the scene, and runs out, cutting through the back garden. Meanwhile, Edie's living room goes up in flames.)
Edie: (OS) Is somebody out there? Oh my god, there's smoke!
CUT TO: [EXT. Edie'S HOUSE ---- NIGHT (LATER)]
(The house is a burning inferno. The neighbourhood has turned out to watch as fire-fighters try and save the blazing house. Edie, wrapped in a blanket and followed by a fireman, rushes out from behind a fire truck and sees the burning house.)
Edie: (teary) Oh my god. Oh... (Leans against the fire truck)
(We follow Susan, as she walks by Mrs. Huber.)
Mrs. Huber: (in a lowered voice, to neighbour) ...candles unattended in the den. Paramedics say she was lucky, she could've been killed!
(Susan walks up to where Lynette, Bree and Gabrielle are standing together behind the tape, facing the burning house.)
Lynette: (to Gabrielle and Bree) She was having sex with some guy when the fire started.
Gabrielle: What happened to him?
Lynette: He got smoke inhalation, he's at the hospital.
Susan: Oh...
Bree: Susan, are you alright? You look awful.
Susan: I'm fine. I'm fine. I just feel really bad for Edie.
Gabrielle: Oh, don't worry about Edie. She's a strong lady.
Lynette: Absolutely. She'll get through this. She'll find a way to survive.
Bree: We all do.
Gabrielle: Come on.
(They all turn around and walk away. Bree, Gabrielle and Lynette go to their respective spouses. Susan goes to lean against a car hood, watching the burning house, arms folded. Suddenly, Mike walks up behind her.)
Mike: Wow, what happened?
Susan: (surprised) Mike!
Narrator: And suddenly, there he was, like a phoenix rising from the ashes.
Susan: I, I thought you were... um. Where were you?
Mike: I just got back from the movies. Edie had a fire, huh?
Susan: Yeah. Yeah, but she's fine now. Everything's fine now.
Narrator: And just like that, Susan was happy. Life was suddenly full of possibilities.
(Susan smiles, looking back at the burning house. Mike looks at her, smiling, as he too turns his head to the house. The camera pans out, showing them standing together from behind, both watching the burning house side by side.)
(Cut to: INT. Mike'S HOUSE - ENTRANCE ---- NIGHT)
Narrator: Not to mention a few unexpected surprises.
(Mike picks up the phone and dials.)
Man: Hello?
Mike: Hey, it's me.
Man: Do you have anything yet.
Mike: No, not yet, but don't worry. I'm definitely getting closer.
(Mike pulls a gun out of his pocket, putting it down next to the phone.)
CUT TO: [EXT. Mary Alice'S HOUSE - FRONT YARD --- DAY]
(Susan, Bree, Lynette and Gabrielle walk down the pathway to the gate, where a car with the trunk open is parked at the kerb.)
Susan: I brought some champagne. I thought we should all have a toast.
Narrator: The next day, my friends came together to pack away my clothes, my personal belongings, and what was left of my life.
Susan: Alright ladies, lift 'em up. To Mary Alice, good friend and neighbour. Wherever you are, we hope you've found peace.
Lynette: To Mary Alice.
Gabrielle: To Mary Alice.
(They clink their glasses together, and drink their champagne. They lower their glasses, and look at each other, remembering. Lynette runs her hand across Susan's cheek affectionately, then goes to the car trunk as they all break up.)
Lynette: Let's get this show on the road.
(Gabrielle holds up a pair of pants from a box on the sidewalk. A piece of paper falls onto the ground.)
Gabrielle: You guys check out Mary Alice's clothes? Size 8, hah! She always told me she was a size 6. Guess we found the skeleton in her closet.
Narrator: Not quite, Gabrielle, not quite.
(Bree picks up the piece of paper.)
Gabrielle: What's that?
Bree: It's a letter, addressed to Mary Alice.
Narrator: How ironic, to have something I tried so desperately to keep secret, treated so casually.
(Gabrielle opens up the piece of paper.)
Lynette: What're you doing? That's private.
Gabrielle: It's open, what's the big deal?
(Gabrielle and Lynette read the piece of paper. They pass it to Susan, who reads the note with Bree looking over her shoulder:
I KNOW WHAT YOU DID
IT MAKES ME SICK
I'M GOING TO TELL
They look up in shock and amazement.)
Susan: What does this mean?
Lynette: I don't know, but check out the postmark.
Bree: Oh my god, she got it the day she died.
Gabrielle: (takes the envelope, looking at it) Do you think this is why she...?
Narrator: I'm so sorry, girls. I never wanted you to be burdened with this.
Susan: Oh Mary Alice, what did you do?
(The camera pans out on Bree, Gabrielle, Lynette and Susan, looking at each other in amazement.)
Episode 102: "Ah, But Underneath"
Previously on Desperate Housewives.
(MARY ALICE takes a box off a shelf in the closet. Looking worried and distraught, she shakily puts a revolver to her temple. We see a finger pulling the trigger, and a loud shot is heard. The camera stays on the YOUNG family picture, as the blurred reflection of MARY ALICE is shown in the frame of the picture falling to the ground.)
(Cut to :)
Gabrielle: If Mary Alice was having some sort of crisis, we'd have known. She lives 50 feet away, for God's sakes.
Susan: Gabby, the woman killed herself. Something must've been going on.
(Cut to :)
Gabrielle: Every time I'm around that man, he tries to grab my ass!
Carlos: I made over $200,000 doing business with him last year. If he wants to grab your ass, you let him.
(Cut to :)
John: Why aren't you happy?
Gabrielle: Turns out I wanted all the wrong things.
(Cut to :)
Gabrielle: What's that?
Bree: It's a letter, addressed to Mary Alice.
(Gabrielle and Lynette read the piece of paper. They pass it to Susan, who reads the note with Bree looking over her shoulder.)
I KNOW WHAT YOU DID
IT MAKES ME SICK
I'M GOING TO TELL
Susan: Oh Mary Alice, what did you do?
OPEN ON: [EXT. GRAVEYARD -- DAY]
(We open on a lily flower planted on the ground of the graveyard. We pan to Mary Alice's freshly buried grave, where we see her tombstone:
MARY ALICE YOUNG
11.18.65 - 9.26.04
Beloved Wife and Mother
There are two bunches of orangey-red roses on either side of the tombstone.)
Narrator: An odd thing happens when we die. Our senses vanish. Taste, touch, smell and sound become a distant memory. But our sight, ah, our sight expands. And we can suddenly see the world we've left behind so clearly. Of course, most of what's visible to the dead can also be seen by the living, if they only take the time to look.
(Cut to: Gabrielle, with her eyes closed, naked as she lies underwater in her bathtub, holding her breath.)
Narrator: Like my friend Gabrielle. I should've seen how unhappy she was. But I didn't. I only saw her clothes from Paris;
(Flashback to: Gabrielle giggling as she twirls, wearing a beautiful black dress, walking towards Carlos, who takes her hand and pulls her towards him, kissing her.)
Narrator: And her platinum jewellery;
(Cut to: Gabrielle, holding her hair back, excited as Carlos fastens a necklace around her neck, a piece of paper, presumably the bill, wedged in his mouth.)
Narrator: And her brand new diamond watch.
(Cut to: Carlos, handing Gabrielle an open box as he walks by, talking business on his cell phone. Gabrielle smiles when Carlos hands her the box, but the smile fades as Carlos walks off, still talking on his phone. End of Flashback. Resume to present.)
Narrator: Had I looked closer, I've seen that Gabrielle was a drowning woman, desperately in search of a life raft. Luckily for her, she found one.
(Gabrielle sits up, smiling as she leans towards John as they kiss.)
Narrator: Of course, Gabrielle only saw her young gardener as a way to infuse her life with a little excitement. But now, she was about to discover just how exciting her life could get.
(Cut to: Carlos in his car, pulling in the driveway. We flash between scenes of Gabrielle kissing John, giggling as Carlos gets out, holding a briefcase in his hand. As he slams the door, Gabrielle stops, hearing a noise. She peeks out the window and sees Carlos walking along the path towards the house.)
Gabrielle: Damn it!?(Grabs John's arm, pulling him out of the bathroom) Come on.
John: Whoa!
(Gabrielle and John hurry down the stairs, slipping and sliding as they go.)
Gabrielle: Come on, come on, hurry! Let's go, let's go!
(They run into the living room. Gabrielle grabs the strewn clothes on the floor, shoving them at John.)
John: Where're the rest of my clothes?
(Carlos stops at the bottom of the path, opening the letterbox to get the mail.)
Gabrielle: I'll find them, just get out!
John: Where?
(Gabrielle looks around, sees the back windows facing the side garden. She points at the window.)
Gabrielle: Out the window.
John: What?
Gabrielle: Go, go!
(As John tries to get out the window, Gabrielle looks at the door, panicked as we cut to Carlos walking up the steps of the front porch. Gabrielle pushes John out the window, grabbing his towel as she wraps her hair in the towel John was using. She smiles at Carlos who walks in.)
Gabrielle: Hi honey, you're home early!
Carlos: My meeting got cancelled. (Looks at Gabrielle as he puts down his things on the table.) You just took a shower this morning.
Gabrielle: I, uh, I just finished a workout.
(Gabrielle's smile fades as she sees John's jeans in the corner of the couch, luckily hidden from Carlos's view. She walks towards Carlos, covering the jeans with a cushion.)
Carlos: Mmm. Where's John?
Gabrielle: John?
Carlos: Yeah. That's his truck out front.
(Gabrielle is speechless, her mouth moving, but no sound coming out of her mouth.)
Narrator: Gabrielle was panicked. She knew if her husband discovered her secret, she would feel the full force of his wrath.
John: Hey Mr. Solis.
(We pan to the open front window, where John is seen, trimming the hedge with his shears. He is wearing his flannel shirt.)
Carlos: Hey, John, did you take care of that ficus yet?
John: I'll get to it as soon as I've done here.
Carlos: Alright. We need to talk about the hedges later.
(John flashes Gabrielle a brief, shy smile as Gabrielle breathes a sigh of relief.)
Narrator: But she was quickly reminded that what Carlos couldn't see, couldn't hurt her.
John: Yeah, sure, no problem.
(The camera pans to the outside view, where we see John, wearing only his flannel shirt and nothing else, as he stands on a stepladder, pretending to trim the hedges. Hehe. Yummy.)
Opening Credits
[OPEN ON: INT. MEYER HOUSE - KITCHEN -- NIGHT]
(We open to look out the kitchen window, where we see the darkened YOUNG house opposite Susan's house. The camera pans to show Lynette sitting on the kitchen counter, rubbing her neck with one hand. We then see Bree holding a dishcloth and wiping her hands, her face sombre, as Gabrielle holds a glass of red wine in her hands. Susan is sitting at the table. They are all looking at the kitchen table, where, in front of Susan, lays the mysterious warning letter found in MARY Alice's belongings. The camera cuts to show a face shot of Susan, Gabrielle, Bree, then Lynette. They all look solemn.)
Narrator: The peaceful facade of Wisteria Lane had recently been shattered. First by my suicide, and then by the discovery of a note among my belongings that suggested a suspicious reason for my desperate act. My friends gathered to discuss its implications.
Susan: (sighs) I think we should give it to Paul.
Gabrielle: He's still mourning, Susan, he'll probably freak out.
Susan: It doesn't matter, she was his wife. He deserves to have all the facts.
Bree: Well, we could do it gently. We could tell him about it over coffee and pastry. (Hands Lynette a cup of tea.)
Lynette: (sips the tea) That would be fun. Paul, we have proof your wife killed herself over some deep dark secret. Another?
Gabrielle: We could always call the.
Lynette: Maybe it's just some sort of sick joke.
Bree: Well if it was a joke, it was in very poor taste.
Susan: No, this was serious, I know it was. We gotta find out what was going on.
Lynette: (puts the cup of tea down on the counter and slides off to lean against the counter) Let's say we do. There's a chance we're not gonna like what we find.
Susan: Well, isn't it worse to be in the dark, imagining she did all these horrible things?
Bree: It's the age-old question, isn't it? (Susan looks up at Bree.) How much do we really wanna know about our neighbours?
(Susan looks at Gabrielle, who looks down at the letter. The camera pans to show the threatening letter.)
[FADE TO: XT. YOUNG HOUSE -- NIGHT --- LATER]
(ZACH stands at the bottom of the emptied pool, looking down into a deep, dark hole that Paul dug up. He looks back at the dark house, where we cut to Paul staggering into the garage, carrying a large, heavy chest. It looks like it hasn't been opened for a long time.)
Narrator: My friends were right to be concerned. They knew that every family has its secrets. And as my son and husband could've told them, you need to think carefully before digging them up.
[CUT TO: EXT. MEYER HOUSE -- NIGHT --- LATER]
(We see our four housewives walking towards the gate. They say their farewells, as Susan walks back into her house. Lynette walks along the left path, Gabrielle walks along the right path and Bree crosses the street all in four different directions.)
Narrator: After talking for hours, my friends still hadn't agreed on what to do with the note. So, they decided to talk about it in the morning after a good night's rest. But no one could fall asleep that night. They each kept thinking of my suicide, and how terribly alone I must've felt. You see, lonely was something my friend's understood all too well.
(Cut to: Susan, lying awake in her bed as she sighs.)
(Pan to: Gabrielle, lying alone in her bed, Carlos' side empty. She looks frustrated, angry and sad.)
(Pan to: Lynette, who turns her head to the empty side of the bed. Presumably TOM is on another one of his business trips.)
(Pan to: Bree, who still looks very prim and proper lying in her bed with a proper white, frilly, lacy nightgown. But, it's sleeveless, Sassy. Bree sighs as she looks sideways at the empty side of the bed. We cut to Bree walking down the stairs to the living room, tying the cord of her dressing gown. She stops at the foot of the makeshift bed where Rex is lying, back towards the camera.)
Rex: (turns around) It's okay, I'm up.
Bree: (smiles) Good. I have a question for you.
Rex: (rolls his eyes, and gets up, sitting next to Bree on the side of the bed.) Okay.